So who is this 'Jay Garmon' jerk...?

Greetings, potential cyber-stalkers! You've reached this page in all likelihood by following a link from one of the various obscure and irresistible outposts I haunt throughout the intarweebs. (That, or Google's "I'm feeling lucky" button just totally hosed you.) Now that you're here, I suppose you want to know just who is this Jay Garmon jerk I've been hearing about?

I, Jared Matthew "Jay" Garmon, am a professional geek. Specifically, I am a writer, husband & father, social media consultant, science fiction nerd, self-professed trivia expert and general Internet addict. Each of these aspects is entertained at different venues around the Web, as listed below. For my consulting rates, check out my Hire Me page.

Social Media Consultant: First and foremost, I have somehow conned my way into being a board member of the Social Media Club of Louisville, a non-profit group that advocates for new technologies and their use for the betterment of communication and society at large. Mostly, we have nerd get-togethers and pontificate about the future of online discourse, commerce, and tech. For reasons defying understanding, the SMC'ville founders assumed I'd be good at that sort of thing, and placed me in a very minor leadership role. I speak regularly on social media and emerging technologies at both SMC Louisville meetings and to external organizations, not the least of which is an ongoing Social Media marketing program at the University of Louisville. (They have their own Facebook page.) I also, upon occasion, develop social media strategies and tactics for businesses, for which I am also occasionally paid.

Writer: This post is hosted on Jay Garmon [dot] Net (formerly known as The Written Weird), which is my personal blog where I prattle on about whatever topics interest me with very irregular frequency. You can also find herein copies of my science fiction short stories that I have "trunked," which is a euphemism for "given up on trying to publish." Yes, I have written other sci-fi shorts, but those I'm actually still trying to get into print. If that ever happens, expect the first announcement to appear on JayGarmon.net along with a copious overuse of exclamation points and bragging to my writers group. As to writing work for which I am actively paid, look no further than my LinkedIn profile, and you'll see I've made my living in whole or in part by stringing together words for CNET, CBS Interactive, Scholastic Library Publishing, and TechTarget, among others. But that's all non-fiction, so it doesn't count.

Husband & Father: Check out my Flickr photo stream, which is almost entirely dedicated to my daughter, wife, family, and friends, in that order, with each respective subject's photo volume descending logarithmically. I also have the requisite Facebook page, but -- fair warning -- I won't be joining your mafia wars, trivia quizzes, or 25 Things memes. I'm there to stay connected, not stay abreast of your newest herd members in Farmville.

Science Fiction Nerd: For several years, I was the host of The Geekend, a nerd culture blog at TechRepublic, a Web community for IT professionals run by CBS Interactive. Predating the Geekend is Geek Trivia, a weekly (ahem) geek trivia column that I wrote for nearly eight years. Both the Geekend and Geek Trivia remain archived online, and have been cited by sources as diverse as author John Scalzi to the editors of Wikipedia. Most of what I would have written for Geekend ends up on the Written Weird today -- most notably in my Nerd Words column -- but you can always go back and see where my online writing career truly began. I also help run a local science fiction convention and make appearances at various local geek meetups, should you be overcome with an urge to stalk me.

Self-Professed Trivia Expert: As a successor to Geek Trivia I now write the Truly Trivial column here at JayGarmon.net, wherein I throw a few hundred words at an obscure factoid that very possibly only I find fascinating. For reasons beyond understanding, other people are entertained by this and thus the kind and talented hosts of the TechTalk radio show on WRLR 98.3 FM in Chicago have me on as a regular guest. There I snark about movies, science fiction, technology, current events and ... eventually ... provide a geek trivia question each week. If you're game for a listen, you can tune in each Saturday at 11:00 am Eastern via the live video stream (where you won't see me, because I appear by phone) or just download the podcast via iTunes. I usually show up about ten minutes into the show and they hang up on me less than fifteen minutes later, so plan your listening accordingly.

General Internet Addict: Perhaps the most holistic view of my life as the Prince of Dorkness can be divined from my Twitter stream. More succinctly, my Google Profile also conveniently links to all the same items found in the Cyberstalk Me section to the right, but Google's version is both prettier and displays my posts from Google Buzz. Finally, for you economic determinists who really want the inside scoop on my consumerist self -- or are looking for the perfect way to bribe me -- there's always my Amazon Wishlist.

In the unlikely event you would like to retain my services as a consultant, writer, speaker, radio guest, conference/convention panelist, or one-shot dungeon master, you can reach me at jay [at] jaygarmon [dot] net. Depending on the job, I can be be had for very free or very not. Pitch me, and we'll talk.

So you want to hire little old me?

Image by TW Collins via Flickr

Because many have asked, yes, I am for hire.

I have served as a professional writer, editor, speaker, community administrator, and online product manager for over ten years. I have a regular radio show spot, my name on a provisional patent, and citations as a source in the Wikipedia to show for it. Google "Jay Garmon" and you'll get plenty of details. (Or just check out my lengthy bio page.) I'm a reasonably smart guy who understands the Web, and I'm offering my talents in exchange for your coin. Specifically, you can hire me as a...

• Writer of blogs, proposals, ads, scripts, or pithy commentary. If you need words strung together in interesting ways, I can get that done.
• Speaker on a variety of subjects, including how to use social media, emerging technology and the like. I also wrote a trivia column for eight years, which means I have a knack for making even the most obscure topics interesting, and I can probably do the same for you on most any subject. Particularly as it relates to tech.
• Strategist for social media and interactive applications, which is to say I can explain how to profitably use Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, blogs, and all the various other nebulous social networking tools that everyone says are changing the world. I've run and built online communities, so I am qualified to consult on policies, strategies, and tactics for building or running your own. I've also overseen the development of features and functions for Web sites, including revamping a multimillion-dollar e-mail marketing system. If you're trying to make smarter, more effective customer-facing software, I have a few bits of hard-earned wisdom I can bring to bear.

But before you contact me with a job inquiry, there are some things to know.

• I have a day job. I work it from home, the hours are flexible and the people are great, but my gig as an editor for TechnologyGuide and Notebook Review comes first, because they pay me twice a month (plus killer benefits) to make sure it stays that way. My full-time attention is not for sale on any consulting project. If you want to hire me as a full-time employee, forsaking all others, you'll have to outbid my currently awesome employer.
• I don't work for free. If your inquiry includes any version of the phrase "we can't pay you," spare both of us the effort, as this will only end in an awkward e-mail where I explain I actually get paid for this stuff. Reasonably well, reasonably often. I occasionally amend my speaking fees for non-profits and charities, but those are handled on a case-by-case basis and I agree to them rarely. You've been warned.
• I am a very public geek. Look over this blog, and you'll note a pervasive interest in science, science fiction, and social media. In the current online world, you need to have a certain measure of imagination to understand how all these new tools and trends work and evolve. Moreover, as everything is now public, pervasive, and persistent, communications skills have become more important than ever. There's no better thought-leader for the social Web than a sci-fi writer. But if having a loud and proud Star Trek fan associated with your brand is a problem, it is best we stop now, because that's who you're hiring, and your customers will figure that out pretty quickly.

If I haven't scared you off with all the above caveats, we can now discuss price. My consulting rate is $100 per hour. I typically bid jobs based on how many hours I estimate they will require, and for speaking engagements this includes preparation, especially if you want a PowerPoint presentation in addition to my words and voice. For recurring jobs -- such as an open-ended blogging assignment -- I discount my rate based on how much recurring work is required. Finally, I am available on retainer, with the regular fee negotiated based on the expected level of time investment.

Questions, comments, or proposals should all be addressed to jay [at] jaygarmon [dot] net. Alternately, you can leave me a Google Voicemail using the link below. All contacts are confidential, and I usually respond within 24 hours. The rest is details.

How to do social media outreach right - don't use social media

Image via CrunchBase

While I was on vacation a couple of weeks ago, I was the recipient of one of the most professionally handled and forward-thinking social media outreach efforts I've yet come across, and considering that I've done social media for a living on more than a few occasions, that's saying something. Even more impressive, the outreach didn't involve LinkedIn, Twitter, Facebook, MySpace or any other buzzword standard-bearer of the overhyped social Web.

The outreach effort was from Tor books (the sci-fi imprint under Macmillan) in relation to their online bookstore. You read that right: A dead-tree book publisher most definitely has a clue of how to play in the digital sandbox, as I'll explain below. The entire communication took place over e-mail, with nary a tweet or friend feed in sight.

I know what you're thinking: Where was the social media? As Chris Brogan and my colleagues at Social Media Explorer (Jason Falls and David Finch in particular) continue to preach but no one seems to hear, social media is about the connections, not the tools. Twitter is a means, not an end, and the Tor group was much better served in reaching their goals through old-school e-mail than overly asynchronous tweetspeak or Wall-to-Wall missives.

What goal, you may ask? Getting an insanely insignificant blogger to give a damn about the new Tor book store. In other words, they wanted me to know about Tor's new project, and went through no minor effort to inform me.

It is no false modesty to say that I am the smallest of small potatoes in the blogosphere. I no longer have my still-not-giant Geekend megaphone, and even my appearances on TechTalk and my tweet exchanges with some moderately well known names in sci-fi and comics don't crank my annual unique visitor levels into the four-figures-a-month range. I'm nobody, and I only barely know a few somebodies, all of whom Tor could much more effectively speak to directly. Using me to ping Mary Robinette Kowal, Lar de Souza or David Gallaher is a pointless effort. Tor has or easily could get all their phone numbers, and they'd all be happy to take the call.

So why waste time with me? Because there is nobody too small in social media. One of my Nerd Words columns made the weekly roundup on Tor's own sci-fi blog, and that was all the validation the digital marketing team at Macmillan needed to consider me worthy of courting as a press source. In the land of Google, every incoming link is worth chasing, and Tor put no small effort into getting some links from little old me.

Not that they ever asked for any link love, mind you. Macmillan's digital marketing manager, Ami, wrote a very brief and straightforward initial e-mail (and the only way to get the address she used would be to read all the way through my bio post) which linked to the new store and the press release covering its launch. Totally professional, but friendly and with enough personalized content to prove she knew who I was and demonstrate this wasn't a blind e-mail blast. Top marks so far, but nothing that out of the ordinary, right?

At no point did Ami ask me to buy anything, pimp anything, or link anything. It was a simple "thought you'd like to know" mail, like she was mailing the New York Times and not Mr. Bloggy McSmallTime, along with a promise to answer any questions I had.

Oh, and the pitch? Tor was launching a sci-fi/fantasy-only online bookstore that carried books from every major publisher, not just Tor/Macmillan. They were selling their competitors stuff side-by-sdie with their own. The boldness of the idea was intriguing, and worthy of its own (future) post.

Naturally, the idea of someone taking on Amazon in the book space when B&N, Borders and Books-a-Million are hemorraging cash intrigued me. I'm a sci-fi geek, aspiring author, and once-and-future Web entrepreneur. Books plus Web plus sci-fi was right in my wheelhouse. So I asked Ami a lot of follow-ups, with lots of gotcha specifics.

She answered the same day -- by looping in the store's project manager who would speak to me directly about the site. Pablo got back to me the next day -- asking me to elaborate my questions -- and he answered them a couple days later with some very thorough responses. He then invited me to ping him again, directly, if I had any future questions.

So, to recap, a major book publisher reaches out to a smalltime nobody with a press release about a bold new Web initiative -- with a personal invite, no less -- and then kicks him higher up the chain when he has questions. At no point do they ask for press, cross-linking, or even a simple purchase. There is no quid pro quo. Everything is professional and pitch-perfect. Oh, and they had to do some research to contact me. No direct, immediate or large payoff, just online community goodwill and knowledge dissemination.

That's how you do social media outreach, boys and girls.

And for what it's worth, it worked. From now on, my Nerd Words column will link to store.tor.com instead of Amazon for my book citations, which is a big deal for me, since I'm an Amazon Associate. I'm leaving (a very little) money on the table because the PR efforts impressed me so. The store is pretty good, too, but we'll discuss that later.

Social media is about socialization, not the media. Remember this and you will succeed.

Here endeth the lesson. Discuss.

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