Harry Potter and the Special Rock
— Matt Ley (@Thelaserbearguy) July 28, 2018
Harry Potter and the Don’t Room
Harry Potter and his Furry Crime Dad
Harry Potter and the Hot Cup
Harry Potter and the Warm Bird Club
Harry Potter and the Absolutely Nothing Happens
Harry Potter and the Curse of the Sidequests
If you put "Elon Musk" in your handle, the very next Twitter screen you click to will be a notice that your account has been locked.
— April Daniels (@1aprildaniels) July 29, 2018
They have the technology to clamp down on Nazis using Nazi buzzwords to organize. They could do that. They chose not to. pic.twitter.com/diDjfW1DpG
I like Ocasio-Cortez's simple messaging. Something like "I believe everyone deserves to live a dignified life" is one of those simple phrases that cuts through partisan wank. The left has failed at messaging for a long time. She has bold simple sound bites. That's necessary.
— Kameron Hurley (@KameronHurley) July 28, 2018
I agree with this generally but note well that in audiobooks frequent use of "said" becomes SUPER noticable. I've cut back on dialogue tags drastically since audio has become a significant portion of my book sales.
— John Scalzi (@scalzi) July 28, 2018
(Also this thread is useful to writers) https://t.co/Q0EFS1aIRb
Pro tip: Don't vote for anyone who makes it difficult for you or your fellow citizens to vote. That's a very good sign they want to rule rather than serve.
— John Scalzi (@scalzi) July 27, 2018
"Socially constructed" does not mean "fake."
— Katherine Cross (@Quinnae_Moon) July 28, 2018
A thread.
It takes the whole cast of queer eye to do what most straight women have to do alone in every single relationship they've ever been in
— Sophia Benoit (@1followernodad) July 26, 2018
I am happy to answer your questions but they are all seeking the same thing: some magical answer that isn’t sit down. Write. Write some more. You don’t need permission or to find some ephemeral thing. You need imagination and a work ethic.
— roxane gay (@rgay) July 26, 2018
Top three traits to look for in a significant other:
— Sam Sykes (@SamSykesSwears) July 26, 2018
1. Kindness
2. Compatibility of goals
3. Hookshot to clear water temples
|￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣|
— Amelia Mangan (@AmeliaMangan) July 25, 2018
I HAVE READ
JAWS
&
THE GODFATHER
AND CAN THEREBY STATE
THIS IS UNTRUE
|＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿|
(\__/) ||
(•ㅅ•) ||
/ っ https://t.co/t8iKW4mrSS
When you know what the protagonist wants most in the world, ask yourself "who is stopping them from having it?" and you have your antagonist. Then ask yourself "]what do they need to learn most in the world and who is teaching them what they don't want to hear?" for your mentor.
— Lou Anders (@LouAnders) July 25, 2018
“Just remember what you’re seeing and what you're reading is not what’s happening."
— Alt. U.S. Press Sec. (@AltUSPressSec) July 24, 2018
— Donald J. Trump, Today
“The party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
— George Orwell, 1984
Among my least favorite complaints on social media is people coming at you with, “Your 280 character tweet doesn’t elaborate all the nuance of this argument.” Yep. That’s why people write articles. You should read them some time!
— Amanda Marcotte (@AmandaMarcotte) July 24, 2018
"Well-run libraries are filled with people because what a good library offers cannot be easily found elsewhere: an indoor public space in which you do not have to buy anything in order to stay." Zadie Smith
— Anna Fitzpatrick (@bananafitz) July 22, 2018
When I hear people say they read a book in one sitting I just wonder what it's like to be unemployed with no kids.
— Barnabas Piper (@BarnabasPiper) July 20, 2018
In my personal usage, "bless you/her", "God bless you/her" or - most frequently - just "bless" are expressions of appreciation or concern.
— Dawn (@502eire) July 20, 2018
If the word "heart" is uttered, I'm definitely being an asshole. https://t.co/AI7vNq8gsZ
BREAKING: a new tape of Kavanaugh on CNN confirms that his position as a jurist is that the only federal investigations of a POTUS that can occur are political ones by Congress. Which means when Congress and the POTUS are from the same party, the president is as good as a *king*.
— Seth Abramson (@SethAbramson) July 20, 2018
I have had more than one male colleague sincerely ask whether a certain behavior is mansplaining. Since apparently this is hard to figure out, I made one of them a chart. pic.twitter.com/7DZ1RTrB3R
— Kim Goodwin (@kimgoodwin) July 19, 2018
Being poor now just leads to being more poor later. Can't pay to clean your teeth? Next year, pay for a root canal. Can't pay for a new mattress? Next year, pay for back surgery. Can't pay to get that lump checked out? Next year, pay for stage 3 cancer. Poverty charges interest.
— Tay Zonday (@TayZonday) July 19, 2018
shrek grossed 484 million just so we’re clear https://t.co/GmuMK2Momz
— sam (@TheAccountOfSam) July 18, 2018
y'know who i dont see enough appreciation for? nani. my girl was only 19 and working hard left and right to raise and support lilo on her own after their parents died. she is every bit the hero all the other disney princesses are and we need to treat her as such pic.twitter.com/pyKXT7PVCY
— gabi (@harleivy) July 16, 2018
"I don't think we need to teach kids about gender fluidity and queer relationships and all that."
— Jim C. Hines (@jimchines) July 18, 2018
We teach kids about gender and relationships and all that from the moment they're born. You'd just prefer we only teach the narrow scope you're personally comfortable with.
Writing Income: What I Made in 2017 https://t.co/GuCkSAcbhn
— Kameron Hurley (@KameronHurley) July 18, 2018
— Jackie Blue (@RealJackieBlue) July 18, 2018
cable news is legitimately just Talking Dead at this point. a bunch of guests with questionable credentials making up fan fiction about what might happen next with what they watched on tv
— jack allison (@jackallisonLOL) July 17, 2018
The simplest explanation — that Trump goes about his business haphazardly, driven by petulance, narcissism, and mediocrity, while those around him scramble to portray it as a plan — is generally the most reliable one.
— WouldOrWouldn'tHat (@Popehat) July 17, 2018
I asked our interns today if any use Twitter.
— Shayan 🌹 (@PasturesPolitic) July 16, 2018
"No, Twitter is for politically angry people with no one to talk to."
I feel seen but in a bad way
Wait, so you're saying the National Rifle Association might have illegally cut a deal with an oppressive foreign government? That seems totally out of character for an organization run by [checks notes] Oliver North
— David Klion 🔥 (@DavidKlion) July 16, 2018
Shorter version of today's events:
— Scott Westerfeld (@ScottWesterfeld) July 16, 2018
Adolf Hitler in the streets.
Neville Chamberlain in the sheets.
Amazon Prime Day: come for the "checkout aisle at a HomeGoods" product selection, stay for the technical failures
— actioncookbook (@actioncookbook) July 16, 2018
I feel so vindicated in my description a few months ago of Elon Musk as a Justin Hammer who thinks he's Tony Stark.
— Minim Calibre (@MinimCalibre) July 14, 2018
People say “why do you only care when police kill people but not when black people kill each other.” Most of those people are trolls but in case anyone has this question in good faith I’ll humor you and address it quickly.
— wikipedia brown (@eveewing) July 15, 2018
Oceans 11. Keep pitt. Kermit slides in as danny. Miss piggy slides in as tess. This is a great fucking question and i want other answers https://t.co/EhS4S45KVy
— FILM CRIT HULK (@FilmCritHULK) July 15, 2018
When you think about the fact that Spider-Man and Superman are full-time journalists and part-time superheroes it really makes time management their most incredible power.
— Craig Bro Dude (@CraigSJ) July 14, 2018
"There are two genders" is the Newtonian physics of human sexuality: it works most of the time but it's not the whole picture. It's pretty adequate for most people's needs but doesn't stand up to scrutiny and is riddled with so many exceptions as to be obviously untrue.
— The Magdalene is of Bajor (@MagsVisaggs) July 13, 2018
Internet: "This is a thing."
— Tom Spurgeon (@comicsreporter) July 11, 2018
Me: "I would like to read about that."
Internet: "Watch this video."
Me: "I will never in a million years learn about your stupid, crappy thing."
Picard ethics tip: The fact that a conflict has many sides does not imply that every side has merit.
— Picard Tips (@PicardTips) July 12, 2018
“People won’t buy your work if you express [opinion]” is almost always code for “I won’t buy your work if you express [opinion]” which, in turn, is almost always code for “I wasn’t going to buy your work, anyway.”
— Sam Sykes (@SamSykesSwears) July 10, 2018
— Anderjak, who Honsts Monstes, (@anderjak) July 9, 2018
"How can I feel strong?" she said.
— A Small Fiction (@ASmallFiction) June 30, 2018
"This hate potion would do," the witch said.
"Oh. How can I BE strong?"
"Don't take the hate potion."
Writing is just learning a lot of tricks and craft strategies to tell a story more effectively, then forgetting them, then trying to remember them again.
— Sam Sykes (@SamSykesSwears) July 8, 2018
Open secret: The reason open plan offices are so popular is that they require fewer square feet per person than cubicles or offices, and so cut real estate costs. It's not because they're more productive.https://t.co/5RcYbLrOep
— Yonatan Zunger 🔥 (@yonatanzunger) July 8, 2018
Protip: The novelty of social media as a bridge to communicate with all people has long since worn off. You don't owe anyone an explanation for muting/blocking/curating your feed however you want.
— Sam Sykes (@SamSykesSwears) July 7, 2018
“One fewer F-35” could and should be your answer any time you are asked how we will pay for any number of social programs. https://t.co/alDql9uX19
— JPat Brown (@resentfultweet) July 7, 2018
Here's what I've learned after working with writers for years: Write about what you think is cool. Seriously. Your insider knowledge will make the world richer. Your passion will make your stories stronger. It's not "write what you know" exactly. It's "write what you care about."
— Brit Elisabet Hvide Busse (@bhvide) July 6, 2018
How many on🌎? (approximate estimates)
— Biolojical (@biolojical) July 4, 2018
10³🐼
10⁴🦁
10⁵🐨
10⁶🐘
10⁷🐪
10⁸🐎
10⁹🐄
10¹⁰👤
10¹¹🐦
10¹²🌳
10¹³🐝
10¹⁴🕷️
10¹⁵🦐
10¹⁶🐜
Twitter, 2009: You followed me? Wow! I'll follow you, too! We'll be buddies! In the trenches! Hey, that lady said a smart thing. I'll follow her!
— Delilah S. Dawson (@DelilahSDawson) July 1, 2018
Twitter, 2018: Before I like your tweet, Imma need to read 2 weeks of tweets to make sure you're not a dangerous asshole.
